Day 131: Ah, Halloween.  Is there any better day on the calendar?  Is there any other day that encourages - nay, REQUIRES - that one wear 4 inch glittery platform shoes to work?  I know, I know, sure, one could make the case for President's Day, but after the Van Buren incident, it's considered a bit gauche. 

As for the why... well, let's remember that I have gigantic feet.  Usually the way I shop for shoes is as follows:

"Welcome to Shoe Warehouse, home of a nearly unlimited selection of shoes!  How may I serve your shoe-buying needs today?"
"What do you have in a size 13?"
"I have one pair of black and green New Balance sneakers with orange soles."
"Okay, fine."  *sigh*

So when I come across sequin-covered platform shoes, I pretty much have a legal obligation to buy them, no?

And now, a couple of quick pictures of the evening in question:

These two were taken at The Golden Bear, a local eatery that also occasionally serves alcoholic beverages.  The cute army girl is our J9, who was coordinating the evening's festivities.

CHRONOLOGY NOTE: The above two pictures were actually shot on the previous Saturday; I'm including them in the Halloween edition of ChainsawPenguin because... because Halloween.

And here we are picking Mindy up from the airport.  Yes, of COURSE we went into the terminal!  And we made people smile, which is part of the fun of life!  And, just, you know, for the record, we're not pimps.  We're doing 70s disco.  People frequently misunderstood our intent.  My shirt is see-through, for cryin' out loud!  What kind of pimp wears a sheer shirt?  I ask you!!

I hope your Halloween was filled with laughs and love, and I hope you got to make someone smile.

PSA: Remember, it's not cool to tempt children to your home with candy any other day of the year.  Just sayin'.

Day 114: I did nothing at all special today.  I went to work, did my job, adjourned to the gym, baked in the sauna (medium well), joined some friends out to watch baseball (for some reason), came home, decided to read, and then decided to write, as is often the case.

On the other hand...

Life is quite simply amazing, and every day we are given a gift.  The gift of good friends, and great laughs, and misty, manly weeping (I mean, did you SEE Katy Perry and Jodi DiPiazza at the Night of Too Many Stars??), and narrowly avoided tragedy, and whispers, and quick glances of just the right sort of girl, and brilliant sunshine, and heavy rain, and excellent food, and other crunchy things.

There are certainly reasons, in life, to be upset, and to worry, and to be genuinely sad.  That's the price you pay for joy, and I'm definitely willing to pay it in full.  The low moments make the highs just unspeakably wonderful, and I wouldn't trade a second of my personal journey, despite some pretty alarming lows.  I need the bitter with my sweet.  We all do.  It's what adds the salt to life.  And the sour.  ...But I digress. 

Ahem.

Today, you and I and everyone we know had the opportunity to smile and speak a kind word to a stranger.  We may have missed some of these moments, but the opportunities are there, every day.  We can walk through a strange city, find a wildflower, eat Cap'n-Crunch-Encrusted-Chicken (yes, this is a real thing), get a moment to ourselves, and maybe even share that moment with someone we have never met before today, or, even better, with an old and dear friend, who may have even been with us during some of the bad old days, but remains a friend nevertheless.  One of the good friends, that you know you can count on.  You know the ones I mean.

I have met a LOT of people in my travels through the world.  I am not sure that I have ever met anyone, ever, who is a bad person.  We are, all of us, just little kids, looking around at the world, with wonder in our hearts and questions on our minds.  It's the ultimate ride, and I will not ever get tired of it. 

I watched a young man named Pablo Sandoval, whom I had never heard of before tonight, hit three consecutive home runs in the first game of the World Series tonight.  He had a pretty excellent evening, I imagine, and his smile in the dugout after his third homer has stuck with me all night.

When he woke up this morning, it was certainly an important game, and an important day.  But I doubt that he knew how wonderfully it would end, and how large his smile would shine on national television, and how many people his joy would touch.  I'm just one of them.

Also, Katy Perry has a heart as big as all outdoors. 

I'm just in love with the world right now, including you, for one simple reason:

Today was an adventure, and we got to share it together.  Even if you live several thousand miles away, you live close to me in my heart.

Every day.

Tomorrow, for me, and you, and everyone you know:

ADVENTURE!!  :)

Day 111: Being sick sucks.  It sucks worse on the weekend.

Like you, I assume, I cook when I'm sick.  I cook comfort food, and drink orange juice.  It occurred to me that I should share my beef stew recipe with you, because it's delicious and easy.

And CHEAP.

And it only takes three hours!  (1 hour prep, 2 hours cooking; but the prep is super-easy, and the cooking requires a grand total of three minutes of direct attention, not counting the browning of the beef, which is probably a total of ten minutes)

3 lbs. stew beef
3 tbsp corn oil (I used a little rendered bacon fat as well, because I happened to have it on hand, and because bacon)
2 large yellow onions, cut in large chunks
3 cloves garlic, cut rough
1/4 cup flour
1 cup red wine (I use a cheap merlot; there's a lot of argument about "using a wine you'd actually drink" but I'm not going to drink red wine anyway, so cheap merlot it is!)
1/2 tsp dried rosemary
1/2 tsp dried thyme
3 cups beef stock
2 russet potatoes, cut in 1/2 inch chunks
4 carrots, cut in 1/2 inch chunks
2 stalks of celery, cut in 1/2 inch chunks

Put the oil (and bacon fat) into a large, heavy stew pot.  Heat on medium high until it smokes.
Mix the beef with salt and pepper in a large bowl. 
Drop the beef, a handful at a time, into the hot, smoking oil, and brown on all sides.
Remove the beef to a bowl using a slotted spoon.
Add the onions to the hot oil, and reduce the heat to medium.  Heat for five minutes.
Add the garlic to the onions, and cook for one minute.
Add the flour, and stir thoroughly for two minutes.
Add the wine, and stir thoroughly for one minute, then scrape the bottom to deglaze the pot of the good brown bits left behind by the beef.  MMMMMMmmmmm... beef bits...
Simmer for five minutes.
Add the rosemary and thyme and beef and beef stock.
Raise to a rolling boil.
Reduce heat to a simmer, cover, and cook for one hour.
Add potatoes, carrots, and celery.
Raise to a rolling boil.
Reduce heat to a simmer, cover, and cook for one hour.

And then eat it in your FACE.

Comfort food is the greatest thing ever.  Also, if you're really having a bad day, go get a strawberry milkshake.

Tomorrow, ADVENTURE!!  :)

Day 110: I hab a code.

Day 109: Every once in a while, you get to experience middle school gym dances.  I wish, fervently, that this was not true, but there it is.

Tonight was Oktoberfest at my gym. I got all fancied up, and showed up around 7.  The food was good, but, through a series of socially awkward decisions, I ended up face to face with the dead pig, which, in fact, still had a face.  And it was looking at me. 

I am, as you well know, a charming young man, but it's nearly impossible to talk over live music (which is why I rarely go to see live music), and it's absolutely impossible to meet new people under these circumstances.  And the average age of the event is well north of 60, which I wasn't expecting.  And the friends I WAS expecting did not show. 

So I'm standing there at the back of the basketball gym, back to the wall, wondering what's next.

And they turned off the lights.

I was IMMEDIATELY back in middle school.  Just standing there, no friends, at a dance, no idea what to do.

I assume that you, gentle reader, are above this sort of thing, but it was so familiarly terrible that I died a little inside.  Shame, for some reason, rose to the surface, and stamped down every bit of adventure in my soul.

"Throw me the idol, I throw you the whip."

So I threw the whip, hoping something good would happen.

And then I waited.

And he DROPPED THE WHIP.

Now, I could have sat there, in the Aztec temple, and waited to die, but, you know, ADVENTURE!!

I walked out of the gym, dodged the rolling boulder, and headed out to draw portraits of the locals.  I spent a lovely evening, and got a lot of weird requests, but I had a great time.  People frequently try to throw money at me for this, but, honestly, I do it because I do it, and it's super fun.

And because it means I'm not standing with my back to the wall in the dark gym.  Standing in the light is so much better.

Tomorrow, ADVENTURE!!

Day 108: There's a theme in this blog that I'm trying to maintain, and that is that I'm focusing on what has happened, rather than what is about to happen.  I've learned, over the years, that if you write about what you are GOING to do, it's a lot easier to not do it, and then this blog becomes, "Well, I was going to, but then I felt like not doing it, but Henry Rollins is still pretty cool", which is kind of lame.

For this one moment, then, we'll all, collectively, agree to abandon that philosophy and enter the realm of "things Jim is going to do", okay?

Cool?

Right then, here it is:

Cheese Shop.

...

I know, you're like, "Cheese Shop?  That's it?"  Bear with me, a moment, and abandon at your leisure, as always, but there's a thing happening, and I'm totally going to throw my entire face into it.

There's a Cheese Shop opening. In Sacramento. In Midtown (where I happen to live). In November.

Which is next month.

I try very hard not to say, "I'm going to do x", but, I swear to you, "I'm going to do local Cheese Shop!"  That is DEFINITELY going to happen.

Mmm... cheese.

...

In other news, MH and I dropped R off at the aerodrome today, and it's my understanding that he boarded one of the Winged Angels and flew to Chicago for the weekend.  It is my fervent hope that Notre Dame does good things while he is there (he will be attending the game), and also that the Bears do well on Monday night (he will be watching the game), and also that the Gamecocks do well (I will be watching the game), and also that you, YOU, my little penguinian, are happy. 

That last bit is really the most important, by a lot.  I do hope you have a smile on your face.  I do hope that you are not fed into a woodchipper.

Tomorrow, ADVENTURE!!

PS This week I really start learning how to drive the sports car that is DataStage.  It will be impossible to make this interesting to you unless you happen to be a data nerd, but I hope it makes your heart happy that my heart is happy.  :)

PPS I don't tell you often enough how much I love you, but I do, and I'm not lying. 

PPPS (postpostpostscript is dumb, but that's where we are): Jeff and Linds got married, so if you see them, smear them in mayonnaise and blame it on me, the lucky tykes.  Or pour pickle juice on them.  Follow your bliss.  Congratulations and love to you both.  :)

Day 107: I've been away, both literally and figuratively, so let's start there.

I took a quick trip home to SC to visit the fam, and they were amazing.  The tikes jumped into hugs, the sister looked beautiful (as always), the BIL is still awesome, and Jay was a mensch.

I went to Seattle for a weekend, and *B* took me to the aquarium, which, as aquariums are wont to do, had fish.  I love fish, and wish I could have my 75 gallon salt-water tank back, which included an amazing clown fish named "Thor".  He would eat right out of my fingertips. The Seattle aquarium, however, had the best thing ever.

Otters.

Just sitting there.  Swimming around.  One old gent patted his face with his tiny paws, and we could all audibly hear him say, "Holy CRAP, I'm cute!"

And then they brought out the baby otter.

THE BABY OTTER.

It suckled, and swam around, and looked right at me, and he said, "Will you be my mommy?"

Yes, little otter baby.  Yes, I will.

Then CD took me to see Stephen Tobolowsky, which was about 18 kinds of awesome.  Then he took me up to his office (amazing view of the Space Needle), and then asked if I'd like to see the view from the 19th floor.

I admitted that I would, and up we went. And the view was, in fact, awesome.

And then he opened the door to the patio.

I didn't jump off of the patio, 19 floors up, but instead decided to hug the walls. 

Safety first.

It was an incredible view of Seattle, and, in the end, a wonderful visit with excellent friends.

~~~

Tonight, R and I dined at Bistro Michel, a French place about 25 footsteps from my apartment building that we had not yet experienced. 

To.

Die.

For.

You sit on the patio, sipping wine.  Edith Piaf is on the soundtrack, but so are many 1940s French recordings.

The cheese plate is challenging, and amazing, because I love strong cheese.  They do a thing with Swiss cheese that everyone in the world should do: it's cored, and then shaved in a round, creating a wonderful floret of really awesome cheese.

I had the fish, with the lemon oil and pesto-stuffed tomato.  R had the mixed grill, with the sweetbreads, quail, and porkbelly.  I cannot communicate with words how good the food was, because I really want to say, "Just, just taste this!"

For two hours, we visited France, with no rush, or pressure, and with a terribly wonderful host, who turned out to be the owner himself.  Monsieur Richard is a class act.

I know I've kept you in the dark for the past few days, but it's mostly because I was helping with family stuff, and getting emergency dental surgery, and very explicitly not talking about dating in Sacramento.  I MUCH prefer posts like this.

Sacramento is awesome.  Come visit!!

Tomorrow, ADVENTURE!!  :)

Day 97:

Foodapalooza Oct 2012

Fresh White Corn
Butter
Lime Juice

Shrimp Boil
Brined Shrimp
Lemon
Cajun Seasoning

Tomato Water
Ice
Salt

Iceberg Salad Deconstructed
Iceberg Lettuce Leaf
Bacon Shards
French Butter Pear Slice
Bleu Cheese

Asparagus cooked in bacon fat
Dehydrated Prosciutto
Micro Mozzarella Cheese

Duck Confit
Fried Duck Skin
Shredded Duck Portion
Baked Tomato and Kalamata Olive Paste
Micro Mozzarella Cheese with Micro Basil
(the Micro Basil was from my "garden")

Sausage Tour
Six Mustards
Beer 'n' Brat Sausage
Chorizo
Lamb Sausage
Hot Italian Sausage
Sauerkraut

Strawberry Shortcake
Fresh Strawberries Quartered
Shortcake
French Vanilla Ice Cream
Frozen French Butter Pear Slice

Rafi's Popcorn
Coconut Oil
Rosemary
Parmesan Cheese
Smoked Salt

Eight straight hours of cooking.

Six good friends.  I'm leaving out the cocktails, wine, and little noshes.  It was a wonderful day, and we were all full of delicious food.  It was really, really fun, and thanks to my friends for a wonderful day together.  I love all of you, without reservation!

Life is AMAZING!!

Tomorrow: ADVENTURE!!  : )

Day 90: Every once in a while, it occurs to me that other people have adventures every day, too.  Every one of us rises from our drowsy slumber and faces the day, with more or less a plan to continue existing until the end of the coming evening.  We do not, for example, spend our time using chainsaws to trim body hair.  This is because we want to go on, and see what the world has to offer us today, rather than carving large holes into our precious, delicate bodies, right?

So R and I had a wonderful little adventure tonight, and it was a simple one: we went to pick up MH at the airport.  And we didn't wait in the car for her to call us, but instead we were waiting right there in the terminal as soon as she cleared security.

See?  You see that smile on my face, on R's face, and certainly on MH's face??  That's right.  Being met by a friend inside the terminal is just one of those priceless moments.  I intend to make a habit of it.

No, traveling-consultants-who-fly-in-every-single-week, I do not mean you can expect to see me at the terminal every week.  Pfft.  But should you be flying here to see ME, well, then, certainly you can expect to see my smiling face!

In other news, I am recently returned from the Land of Sandlappers, and am happy to announce that all is well.  TheNephew saw me across the cafeteria, and raced across it and jumped into my arms for a big ol' Uncle Jimmy hug.  I turned to his teacher and said, "Never seen this kid before in my life."

TheNiece gave me a big hug when she got off her school bus to find her Californian uncle in her driveway. 

Big hugs from little people make the world go 'round.

I'm just sayin'.

To the (many, many, many) peeps who live in the Palmetto State that I did not have the chance to visit, please accept my humblest and sincerest apologies.  My time was, as ever, too limited to visit with all of you.

Tomorrow, ADVENTURE!!  :)